A Date

What stage of American society are we on? Some people might claim we are on the lowest, and that would make sense, considering the myriad of economic and social problems in our country. But that’s something towards a more political standpoint. What I want to know is something far much simpler. Where are we in terms of romance? Judging from the typical movies and almost ways many children are brought up, we follow a rigid path. You know – the interest, date, and seeing if things progress. It’s always like that in the movies. The guy goes to a fancy restaurant with a gorgeous girl and they end up in bed. Awesome. Except that’s not reality and the old-fashioned demeanor seem, well, old.

And there’s my problem with America’s mentality towards “love.” Are we supposed to be like made up television? I mean, really, should I be the uniform-guy and start asking girls on dates? I think that’s wrong. Interest happens in the most whimsical ways, and usually that’s the best. But to constantly get to know each other through first dates? Terrible. Does a girl have to wait for a guy to make a move? Quite frankly, the expectations we have of each gender is superfluous. We are all humans with mutual feelings and I’m not making an excuse for all the low-confidence guys out there, including myself, of course. I believe it’s just a simple fact that females should know and respect. I despise the mindset of looking at the opposite gender like an enigma. The answer is actually very simple the majority of the time. Think about yourself and how you feel and there’s the solution to all the “why does he/she do this” questions.

And the entire ideology around a date is ridiculous. We are constantly on dates, with our close opposite gender friend, or even with a friend of the same sex. In the end, it’s all how we interpret things, and the point of a date is to have fun. I am not debunking the idea of a date because I think it’s overrated, but, rather, the vapid and stereotypical words people associate with dating are OUTDATED. (See what I did there?) And we look at these one-night outings in terror. Good friends clearly can’t go on dates because that would mean they have feelings for each other. NO. That is completely erroneous. How can someone even consider a date something negative if they have never tried it with another person? I just don’t understand and it’s America’s viewpoint and media that guises the truth.

Okay, maybe I’m a little jealous. Maybe I’ve seen one too many couple at the movie theater tonight. But, regardless, I think many people can agree that the association between dating and love need to be changed. I am not disapproving of dates, or dating for that matter, but rather insisting that our ideology around the word be different. But, of course, who am I to persuade other people’s thoughts and mind? I’m only someone who has never truly been on a date.

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I am currently an unmotivated mess. I do not want to do anything. I complain about the mundane happenings of everyday, yet I cannot find enough courage to take any action. My mind is filled with brilliant ideas, encased with pedantic vocabulary, yet I cannot express anything I want. I worry about petty things and major things; I tend to worry about the former more. Disappointments shroud any optimism I have. I question many things. I’m your typical teenager right now – confused and arrogant.

I despise my tendency to crave writing but never fully finish anything I type. Deep down inside,  I feel the need to be Shakespeare. Exactly what does that prove? My abilities are nothing of that sort. The futility of my decisions just keep echoing in my mind. Maybe it’s just summer vacation. Come soon, College.

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The past two weeks have been utter misery. Of course, at the start of it all, I looked forward to a change of scenery. I wanted to go somewhere I couldn’t be bothered. But all of that proved quite the contrary; I’ve wanted to leave ever since I got here. I can’t stand the dull mornings and even duller afternoons. I dislike so many things here and I am simply not used to the lifestyle here – to the point where I’ve been looking forward to leaving. Continue reading

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A Short Reflection of High School

Over a week has passed since the last day of high school. Although that date technically isn’t the last day, the grades were handed in, so who cares?  High school has been an enriching experience – to say the least. I really want to say I despise Bayside High School and sometimes I do. Sometimes I can’t wait to storm out of the hallways, always crowded by tons of black girls, and scurry home for some peace. I can name many things I dislike about Bayside. Some teachers really need to be fired. The school needs to stop wasting paper on superfluous notifications. Do the janitors even clean the bathrooms? Truancy actually needs to catch the people who get high 24/7 across the park. The list goes on. Continue reading

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For you, For You, and Only You.

I want to be frank, a little blunt, a little there.

Tell the ENTIRE world, that you’re here

With me, with me, and only me, I don’t wanna share

Your entire existence too grand, not really fair Continue reading

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Am I Really a Good Writer?

My writing often undergoes the highest of compliments and I mention this NOT in an ostentatious manner. I don’t really understand why people say I write well; yeah, sure, I know the fundamentals of basic writing, but so do thousands of people in America. I am nothing special and my pieces of work often consists of topics that I think are amazing, but also often end up as things I can hardly write a thousand words about.

There are a myriad of ways my writing is absolutely atrocious. Sometimes, I don’t even know what to write about. I also procrastinate too much. When I have an idea, it often comes when I’m playing video games, oddly. After I finish with a level, I forget about what I wanted to write about. Don’t even get started about my sentence structure. I realized I have been using WAY too many commas, and although I’m trying to change that, (see what I mean?) I just love making my sentences filled with commas. I do not have perfect grammar and I definitely lack word diction; sometimes I look up synonyms because I feel too repetitive.

Yet, people still bombard me with generous comments about my essays and writing. Some people say I write well and others firmly believe I know everything about grammar – which I don’t. I do not believe I deserve the praise I receive from people. Besides, I’m only seventeen years old. I love the flattery but all of it only makes me wonder more: am I truly a good writer?

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Everyone gets these. Its the epitome of an item everyone looks forward to receiving and we love spending hours thinking of amazing comments to say to one another. We look to flatter, reminisce, and maybe even confess in our words. We all claim that everyone will “stay in contact” and “keep in touch.” The prospect of leaving something we had four years to develop is so unbearable that we look for the educators, who guided us through, to say something that reminds them of us.

Lets be honest now. I don’t know how many people I’m gonna talk to in the future. We all hope to stay in touch, but truth is, drifting apart is inevitable. Scheduling a coffee date with everyone is simply unfeasible. Even people we’ll see in College disappear. The friends we knew everyday in Math class will soon become “the guy who helped me through high school” and the girl/boy we had a crush on becomes “I don’t wanna talk about it.” We lose a lot more than we gain.

Every high school graduate should look back into his junior high school yearbook. How many people honestly kept in touch? Probably very few. But this is why we have yearbooks. We yearn to look back at the memories and laugh. Sometimes we even cry at the misfortunes. We look at the signatures and think about those silly memories in McDonald’s and the hallways. Looking back is exactly what we need to bring us to the future and improve our present; its a sad method but a necessary one at that.

This is why yearbooks are so great.

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In the futility of my feelings, I often feel jealous about a plethora of things. Sometimes I try to tell myself I’m stronger than this and that jealousy only leads someone to be paranoid, which often results in me wasting my time trying to console myself. I firmly believe jealousy is the root of many evils, including the wars that are going on today, and the widespread corruption in our Government. Things even go as far as to affecting celebrities. Why do people hate Justin Bieber and Miley Cyrus? Because people are jealous of them.

Jealousy often leads to more devastating effects, such as anger. A tint of the passion of just wanting to be the person, for example in a picture, really spurs the mind to think of eradication. Wouldn’t it be better if you could just destroy the person you want to be with? Obviously, this is not a sensible, nor moral, answer to a problem. This feeling even leads to paranoia. It’s quite hard to just forget about an unpleasant snapshot and the mind can only wonder what the future might hold. What if the success continues? What if everything goes according to some impossible perfect plan? What could be is a scary thought, and quite frankly, none of us want to see any of it unfold.

I constantly try to conquer jealousy and I’m often lose the battle. There’s something mystical about negative emotions that makes it such a divine aspect of humans. I have come to the conclusion that pride blinds people from choosing the correct path.  We don’t like to submit and we hate admitting someone else is right. Watching someone take the place of one’s dream is a difficult thing to do. Essentially, one can interpret that to mean that he has not succeeded and looking for prosperity is utterly fruitless. Jealousy is incredibly hard to contain. As a matter of fact, nobody will ever be near defeating nature’s will. I just believe it’s how one mitigates the effects and remembering that the future can be changed; the present is sometimes nothing more than a mirage to meld good fortune.

Of course, I should probably take my own advice.


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Prom is overrated.

Call me a negative person. Continue reading

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The National Honor Society

Supposedly, America “ended” segregation in schools after the landmark decision of Brown v. Board of Education. The case declared separate public schools for white and black children illegal, resulting in the current mix of ethnicity we see in many classrooms. However, in reality, the education system has found a different way to legally separate and almost condemn students. National Honor Societies, found in almost every public school in America, offers admission based on educational merit and really nothing else. Although I agree some of the top-notch children deserve, perhaps, recognition of their accomplishments, a National Honor Society is clearly the incorrect way to go about this

I am not educated about America as a whole and how every Honor Society works in different schools, so I will solely base this on the happenings in many New York City public schools. Continue reading

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